Simple Existence

Wow, I just realized I haven’t posted in quite some time! We have had a really busy, fun summer. We were able to play in Taos, spend a week kayaking and hiking on Steamboat Springs and Sweet Boy got to go with his cousin and my parents for a fun filled week in San Diego. It has been a great summer! We spent almost every Saturday morning at the farmer’s market and tried to eat as locally as we could. I am still enjoying the last few days of sunshine but have to say that I am a little excited that the days are starting to cool down and that we are moving into fall. Work is great. This is the first summer in a long time that I have had a really good work/life balance. I’m now adapting to more scheduled days and getting back into the school routine with Sweet Boy. This is the best school year we have started so far! Socially things are going well, reading at night is easy and SB loves math. Now we just have to figure in how to fit in soccer and guitar lessons into the week. Hope that everybody is enjoying the summer and doing well. Here are a few of my favorite pictures from the summer.

I can’t believe that our baby is 10 years old today.  Time goes so fast.  The other night he really wanted to learn how to mow the lawn.  Deb helped him with the front yard and together, they did a great job.  He was so proud.

We tricked him with his birthday present.   Over the last couple of months, he has done a few things that made us nervous about getting him a new guitar.  I don’t want to digress here, but basically he needed to show us that he could take care of his things.  He kept asking when he might be able to get a guitar, and I kept tell him when he is about 13.  Yesterday, he reminded us of how good he has been doing at taking care of things.  We said how proud we were, and that it was too bad that we had already bought his present.  Maybe next year.

Oh, was he surprised this morning

Tonight we are having dinner with my side of the family, as today is my mom’s birthday as well.  Tomorrow, we are going have a party for our family of friends and Deb’s side of the family, and Saturday we are leaving for a week in New Mexico.   When we get back, he will celebrate his birthday with his birth grandma and aunt.  I love birthdays in our house.  We tend to drag them out over several days, sometimes weeks.

Sweet Boy came home from school the other day sobbing his eyes out.  He was terribly sad because he was going to miss his friends for the summer.  Luckily he got a few of their numbers. 

This touches my heart more than I can even express.   For me to say where he is today, compared to where he was when I adopted him, I would have to write a book.  I often say he is just a normal 10 year old boy, but the truth is that he still has a lot of healing to do, and his wounds make it very difficult for him a times.  As hard as he is sometimes, and I mean hard, he is complete joy to have around.   This is the best school year we have ever had.  A summary of his elementary experience is this:

Kindergarten – Missed 3/4 of it.  Got uprooted from his abusive home and came to live with me.  Put him in a private summer program, but wasn’t really intended to be educational.  Socially, he was a complete mess.  

1st grade – completely unprepared.  Couldn’t really hold him back because as far as he was behind academically, he was street wise beyond his years.  They almost didn’t let him get past first grade.  Barely made it.  No real friends.

2nd grade – socially a complete mess.  Curious, hyper, very behind in reading.  Wonderful teacher, but more mother than teacher.  He consumed her attention.  I had to fight really hard to keep him from being put in ’special’ classes.   No real friends.  Teacher couldn’t believe how mature he was in relationship with adults, but completely at a loss with kids.

3rd grade – Excellent teacher with really good boundaries.  Finally catching up.  Still, no friends.  Low self esteem.   

This year – Amazing.  New school.  Amazing teacher.  Really, they put on an opera, and he did a powerpoint for his book report.  Also, he went to Youth City after school, which I attribute to most of his social growth.   For the first time ever, he started to remember his classmates names, could tell me things about them, and all the kids would say good bye to him when I would pick him up.   So, for him to make friends this year, is a really big deal. 

Also, for the first time ever, Sweet Boy was given an award at school.  It was for his outstanding attendance and his not being tardy even once.  He only missed two days for being sick.   He was so proud that he could barely stand it when he got home.  We are so, so proud of him.  We are good parents, and have provided a safe and loving place for him to grow and heal, but he has done most of the work. 

Because Deb had to leave town on Mother’s Day, I waited until she got back to give her these flowers. It has been so good to see her face, and feel her skin, and just be together doing nothing.  Whatever we were going through with SB has passed.   It has been a pleasure this week and even when he his attitude has reared it’s head, I am not getting hooked.  

My trip was rejuvenating in one sense, and exhausting in the other.  Instead of trying to get everything unpacked and put away, we just decided to be on Saturday and Sunday.  I cleaned the house a little on Saturday, but still we have been scrimping for laundry and living out of suitcases all week. 

I took Sweet Boy out for a special dinner with just the two of us on our way to pick up Deb from the airport on Saturday night.   We had Chinese food.  I had a really great Asian salad, and he had sweet and sour chicken and some fruit punch.   His chicken was kind of tough and he said it didn’t taste very good, but we were in a hurry and I didn’t have time to really complain about it.  Well, he either got the 24 hour flu, or he got food poisoning from the chicken.   Either way, he yells at 3 am, as he runs from his bed to the bathroom, that his stomach hurts.  He didn’t make it to the bathroom….. The life size teddy bear that went from living in my beloved’s waiting room, to living in SB’s room, now lives at the dump.  Our poor little bugger slept all day Sunday and didn’t eat much.  He was all better by Monday morning.   

We are all off for the next four days and I am really looking forward to unplugging everything.  I was planning on gardening and hiking, but it looks like it might be a little rainy.  So, I guess I’ll just ‘have’ to stay inside and read a good book or two.  Yes, Yes, Yes…. we get to sleep in and have lazy coffee mornings all weekend. 

Have a great weekend!

I really don’t have time to write today.  I have been in FL for the week and it has been great.  Even though I have been working really hard, I have been relaxing a little as well.    The beach was great and I saw a few great sunsets.  I am here with my boss this week and let’s just say that it is much easier to be indulgent when I don’t have to submit it on my expense report.  Crab and steak anyone?  I think I have gained five pounds.    We went to dinner with my boss’ boss last night.   He took us to a casual, but really nice place near the water.    Other news….  While I will be in the same role, I am no longer going to report to my current boss, as he is moving from one director position to another.   I will move directly under his boss, which I currently have a dotted line relationship with anyway, so it might not be that big of a change.  I am really excited about this as it will open up a lot of opportunities.  He has turned things around here since he came on-board and I think I can learn a lot more working within the department in a more cross functional way.   Good Times.

I miss my beloved terribly and have to wait until she gets back from her trip on Saturday.   We have had some really great phone calls this week.   Also, I can’t wait to see my little boy.  It has been a good break, but I can’t wait to get back.   He did really well with my parents this week, but is ready to be home.  I can’t even tell you how great of parents I have.  He got a little mad one day and told my dad that my mom was a little ornery.      

Yesterday was my beloved’s birthday. I feel so lucky to get to grow old together. Every year brings new opportunities and moments of getting to love and be loved deeply. For that I am grateful, and for that I love her with all of my heart. We had a day full of presents, and then a delicious dinner with my parents at Cafe Trang, with a carrot cake to follow. Yummy….

I can’t wait to celebrate her again tonight with our family of friends, and then on Saturday on Sweet Boy’s ’surprise’ birthday hike, and then some very kind and wonderful friends are throwing her a birthday dinner on Sunday. Birthday weeks are good.

He is so sweet lately. He never remembers to get us gifts without one of us reminding him. He has been planning this ’surprise’ birthday hike for the last week and a half, completely on his own. He asked her to please make sure that we don’t have any errands to run, as that is all we have done the last week. I asked if he wanted to also get her a gift card for her favorite coffee shop, and he said that one coffee after the hike would have to do. I think it is so sweet that he picked giving her an experience over buying a gift with my money.

I LOVE our new kitchen. We have been without a kitchen for over a week now, and with the exception of the range being delivered, we are almost back in order. I had no idea how hard it would be to eat good food without a kitchen. Our saving grace was One World Café! It was really the only way we could feel like we were eating anything nourishing. We tried to eat one big meal there each day. We don’t eat out often, so it was kind of fun, but I can’t wait to start cooking again! If I knew how to load pictures I would post some. Maybe I will try and figure it out this weekend.

We have been stuck for the last couple of years in house limbo. That is mostly because we have been stuck in baby limbo. Should we sell the house, should we do a major remodel, can we find the perfect house without losing all of our financial freedom?? It’s been fun looking for houses, but stressful at the same time.

Knowing we have plenty of space for the three of us, has finally brought some movement. Finally!!!! We are finally going to remodel our kitchen. I think this is the most movement we have made ever. As much as I really don’t like a number of things, I would have been happy with just getting new appliances. So, to realize they can do the whole kitchen and stick to our budget is amazing. The labor costs are very reasonable, and we are saving a ton of money based on their ideas and experience.

We are painting the walls a color called firenze…. A color that makes me want to cook Indian food, or drink a Mexican hot chocolate. Spicy. We are getting new appliances. Yes, yes, yes… Finally, a gas stove, and real fridge…

We have decided to do something in the middle. We are only remodelling as if we might sell it one day, but only putting in the things we love……. without breaking the bank. Once we finish the kitchen, we will be moving to the front of the house to add a little curb appeal. We are going to paint the front door a color called warm cognac…

Then on to the bathroom………………